Second Coming
by LanaaLuthor
Summary: alternative sequel to J e XMination/ Jessica finally deals with all the problems and traumas she's been through and falls in love again.
1. Chapter 1

**Description: **Jessica finally deals with all the problems and traumas she's been through and falls in love again.

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Oliver handed me a knife. I grabbed it. It wasn't even my intention, but something inside of me did it like I had no control over my body.

The steel was cold in my hand.

"Stab me in the heart," Alexander asked. "It's my father's heart and I've always hated it. Since the moment I got it."

"Lex, I…" I stammered, sobbing.

"I love you. You need to do this. You know there is no other way."

"I'll do it," Oliver volunteered. "I already have blood on my hands on the contrary to you and Clark," he told me. "I killed him once, I can kill him again."

"Jessica, please," Alexander asked me again.

"I saw what killing Lex did to you the first time, Oliver," I found myself speaking. "And I tried so hard to help you and yet, I couldn't. I will not watch that again. Killing him will not bring you peace. I know he murdered your family, but I want you to stay the Ollie I know."

"Kill the part that is my father and then I will die like I was supposed to. Remember? The only missing piece that prevented me from raising again was a heart," Alexander told me.

I nodded and kept crying. I held the knife in my shaky hand.

"I love you, Lex Luthor," I told him, but I didn't really feel this love at the moment. I loved the man that was already gone. Killed by Locians, not by me.

I bent down and I kissed him.

Then I put the knife to his chest.

And I stabbed him.

As I watched the blood soaking his shirt, his eyes drifting away, heard the scream coming from the Lex behind me, I pictured myself Lana.

Lana Lang, my first best friend. Lana who'd died so tragically during the meteor shower.

* * *

_Please, take care of him, _I prayed to her.

_There is so many ways to die…_

_ Dagger in your guts. Bullet in your head. An accident. Knife to your heart._

_ Old age used to be on that list once. It is no longer._

_ People have a choice, but they don't choose otherwise as they still don't have enough time. _

_ Some of them have too much, like me._

_ I repeat. Dagger in your guts. Bullet in your head. Knife to your heart._

_ Shock. Pain. Cold. Falling into nothingness…_

_ Being alone._

_ And then not being alone anymore._

_ That's the circle of life._

* * *

I kept on living, but yet, it felt so surreal. Like it wasn't real. I lived like I was watching my life from another person's perspective. Like I wasn't really in it. Maybe I was still in shock.

Had all of this really happened? Had I…

After a brief talk with my kids I retreated to the same apartment I'd been staying in when I and Lex had been separated. I couldn't come back to the mansion. I just couldn't.

Lily took the news better than Alex did. She hated her father with every fiber of her being for what he'd done to the man she loved. I could understand that, but I hoped she would be able to rid of this hate as more time passed by. I didn't want her to live like this.

Alex, surprisingly, was mad. He couldn't believe that he'd just lost his father, that there was no proof that it hadn't been Lex who'd killed all those people. Did my son still believe in fairy tales? But on the other side, he'd been raised in a world that was rid of evil. I just hoped he would be able to move on.

Both Lily and Alex wanted to be alone for now. Lily probably went to visit Connor's grave and then she would go to see her friends. Alex was with Imra and I could only be grateful that he had her in his life. If anyone could make him better, it was her. Maybe she would also succeed where I couldn't. Maybe she would make him understand.

That left me with no purpose, so I just came back to my apartment and go to bed.

* * *

Hours later I was still in bed, having a sleepless night, but I didn't feel like getting up. What for? What was out there, waiting for me anyway?

I didn't even want to talk to anyone else at this point. I was just lying under covers, feeling guilty that I still didn't feel anything. There was grief, but it wasn't as strong as I would anticipate. I was just numb and tired to even be surprised about my lack of feelings at the moment.

Suddenly, someone landed in my room and I jumped.

It wasn't Clark. It was Oliver.

"Ollie?" I asked, surprised. "What are you doing here? And don't you know how to use a door?"

"You wouldn't have opened," he just said and came closer.

He had a point there. Damn him.

"How are you?" he asked me.

"Shouldn't I ask you this question?"

"Jess, I'm seriously worried about you," he confessed and sat on the edge of the bed.

I supported my head on my hand, but I was still lying down.

"I feel guilty," I just said.

"How many times do I have to tell you that it wasn't your…" he started, but I interrupted him.

"I feel guilty, because I don't feel anything," I confessed silently.

"Oh," that surprised him.

"I haven't for a very long time now. Even when Lex came back… I was just… numb… but this was probably because he wasn't the Lex I knew."

"I can understand that," Oliver admitted.

"It's not everything… I've done something bad. I mean… really bad, Ollie," I started, feeling that if I didn't get it off my chest then I would never find peace again. I could as well tell him.

"I know, but you had no choice," he said.

"No, it's not what I'm talking about and… God, I swore not to say anything to anyone, but I… I just can't live with this secret."

"What secret? You know you can trust me."

"Even if this will hurt you?" I asked him. I wasn't a fool. Something had started crystallizing in my head a few weeks ago, but I'd chosen not to think about it at all. I'd always knew deep down inside that Oliver had feelings for me, but never admitted it to myself. His kiss proved it, what Lex had said about him also proved it.

"Even if I'll hurt me," Oliver confirmed. "Shoot."

"I… I slept with Clark," I said quickly and avoided Oliver's eyes.

He didn't say anything and eventually, I needed to look up at him again. He was in shock.

"You… slept with _Clark_?" he finally repeated as he wanted it to sink in or just couldn't believe it.

"Well, not technically slept… we just… you know…" I blushed, feeling so awkwardly at the moment. Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything in the first place.

"I would never suspect that you two…"

"I know, me neither and I think neither would Clark. It just happened. We were both having marital problems… one moment we were talking and then… I don't really want to go into details, Ollie. I just… I feel like a bad person," I confessed.

"Why? Lex has been sleeping with Eve Tessmacher. Probably more than once," Oliver said. Ok, that hurt me, but I had no right to be hurt since I'd done the same to Lex.

"But it wasn't… him."

"Only it was," Ollie corrected. "And you know it."

"Fuck," I cursed. "Would you just stop?"

"Alright," he agreed. "You shouldn't think of it anyway. It's done. It's all done," Oliver told me. "And if you want to know if you should feel guilty after all, answer this question, did you, throughout your relationship with Lex, even once wanted to or thought of sleeping with someone else?"

"No," I realized with horrification. "Oh, my god! No! I didn't! Never!"

"So Lex thought of it, but you didn't. There's your answer. Can we stop dwelling upon the past now?"

"Oliver, I'm sorry. I never wanted to burden you with this…" I started apologizing.

"It's ok. That's why I'm here. I'm here for you." He touched my face when placing his hand on my cheek.

"Still, I should've felt more loss… I remember when he died the first time…"

"Maybe it wasn't real love after all," Oliver spoke, "maybe it wasn't _the _love of your life."

"I know you've already explained why I supposedly wanted Lex, because he was original and broken and all, but I'm still not sure if that was the real reason…" I started.

"You're doing it again, you're dwelling… Oh," he sighed, "ok, it must've been the uniqueness of him as you preferred him over all those handsome billionaires with gorgeous hair," he tried his luck at joking.

I laughed. He finally made me laugh. And that made me feel something else than numbness.

"Maybe I loved the physics of him? The smoothness of his body…" I started, not really being serious.

"Oh, come on! I feel really offended! I have great hair! And I don't have much hair on my body! You've seen my smooth chest!"

I laughed harder. Humor was, indeed, the best free medication for pain.

"I also think he dominated you as everything and everyone he'd ever touched," Ollie's voice grew serious.

"Oh, you might have a point there. He had a gift for that, didn't he?" I admitted."And you know what else bugs me?"

"Go on, shoot, I feel like I won't manage to convince you that you _shouldn't dwell on the past_," Oliver teased, sighing theatrically.

"He said it himself. He was meant to die and never come back. If that was his destiny, then… what is mine really? If it wasn't him, then who? If it wasn't life with him, then what else? And if it wasn't it, then how the hell it lasted so long? It doesn't make any sense!"

"Maybe it lasted so long, because he came back from the dead and you believed so firmly that you two were meant to be that there was no alternative? That you _saw no_ alternative? You thought it was true, you believed it and you never questioned it."

"You should get a psychology degree, you know? But, so what that I thought that way? There was nothing else left for me. _No one _else. You ran to Chloe, Clark to Lois and I, I was so alone it only felt natural that Lex was there for me. That he came back for _me_."

"He came back, because Lionel was selfish and thought he could repent for his sins by bringing his son back to life," Oliver said seriously, not laughing at me anymore, seeing that I was really bothered by all those questions. "But Lionel was an evil man and he would never be good, Jess. He didn't understand what being good meant anymore."

"Or maybe love just has an expiration date, after all." I shrugged, sitting up on the bed because my arm was starting to get sore.

"Or maybe it wasn't the right kind of love," Oliver said. "Jess, I'll tell you a secret," he added suddenly and I looked at him, interested. "Chloe always loved Jimmy and I… I've always loved… well, you."

There was silence.

And I was petrified.

I thought he had feelings for me, hell, I had feelings for him too! But love… love was serious. Love was…

"And you didn't say anything for over a hundred years?!" I suddenly yelled at him. "Lex was right, after all!"

Oliver closed his eyes. He was hurting, I could tell. All I wanted to do was to hold him tight and tell him everything would be alright, but I just couldn't.

"I was happy that Lily and Connor got together," he confessed. "I thought that they could make it right this time, but it seems like Lex was right. Queens should not mix with Luthors…. Also, you aren't a Luthor, Jessica, not really. It's not in your blood," he added on seeing the confused look on my face.

I started crying again. I couldn't hold myself back. He was right. But who I really was, then?

"Hey, hey, it's ok. It's gonna be ok," he told me in a soft voice and got into bed with me after a brief moment of hesitation, then took me into his arms just like I'd wanted to take him a moment ago.

"Why did you get together with Chloe, then?" I asked. "Why?"

"We were both lonely and needed someone. We were both broken and… maybe some part of me felt guilty for what happened to Jimmy…"

"It wasn't your fault," I said adamantly.

"Maybe… or maybe it was."

"You said yourself that you didn't blame me for killing… Connor," I finally managed to say. "So I say to you that you had nothing to do with Jimmy dying."

We looked at each other with our faces so close.

I didn't even know when it happened, but suddenly, we both closed the distance between us and we kissed.

And I was terrified, because I did feel something. Something very real.

Only it was too soon. I needed to take my time to figure out where my life would go from now on. I couldn't just jump into another man's arms, hoping that this would make everything right. I'd done that in the past and now I knew that it wasn't the right way, the right thing to do.

"Ollie," I said, pulling away, my hand pressed firmly against his chest, "I can't. Not now. It's too early."

"I understand."

"But could you… could you maybe… stay for the night? I don't want to be alone."

"Of course."

We lay down and Oliver was still holding me in his arms, but he did not make any move on me. Then I finally fell asleep, feeling save.

"You're the only one I have left, Jess," I heard him saying right before I drifted off. "The only one I love."

The next morning he was gone.

* * *

It touched me so much I wanted to cry.

It was Lex's funeral and they were all here. My friends, my family.

I knew they came for me, because some, obviously, did not do this for Lex.

They all loved me and wanted to show their support. They understood me. They weren't angry with me. They did not turn their backs on me. They didn't blame me for trying to help someone, for loving him.

The only person still mad at me and everyone else was Alex. I could only hope he would get over it soon. I knew Imra could help him.

Thanks to the presence of all of them, I felt like my world didn't come crashing down on me, although when I saw the casket being lowered into the ground, I felt grief. It finally hit my heart. And I wasn't even burying the man I loved. Oddly enough, there were two bodies in there, together. They together created the man I used to love and then lost forever. An ultimate proof that there was no way they could be made into one again.

It was sad and heartbreaking. Fate, indeed, was a vicious creation.

"I will make sure your legacy is finished, Lex," Clark spoke to my astonishment. "I will make sure we find a planet on which the human race can go on in case of some cataclysm."

I truly had no words.

Clark managed to pick the best idea came from Lex and thanks to that, the memory of the good, but yet conflicted Lex, the broken man I'd mended once before he broke again, lived on.

Finally, I managed to send a silent thank-you to Clark and he just nodded.

* * *

I decided to leave Metropolis, to leave America even. I needed to deal with my life, to cope with what I'd lost and to decide what I should do now. It would be a hard choice, especially when I could live forever.

For a moment there, I thought maybe I could just stop taking VA and die, but… why? Would Lex really want me to just give up? And could I? I was somehow stronger. So much stronger when I'd been the first time I'd lost him. I finally matured enough, grew up and realized the world did not end with a man. I had to be better than this. I was making myself happy. No one else could do it for me. It was _my_ job.

I left for the airport right after the funeral and I did not talk to anyone about it. I just left letters for Lily and Alex, so they knew that I would be fine. I didn't tell them where I was going though. I didn't know myself. I just wanted to travel around the world, to find myself, to make myself happy with no one's help.

"You were going to leave without saying goodbye?" I heard a voice that used to belong to my best friend.

I sighed and turned around, facing Clark.

"I… I didn't know what to say to everyone, so I just… took off. Clark, I need to do this on my own. I need to leave for some time, clear my head, find happiness again. I think I forgot how that felt."

"I understand and I'm not here to stop you," he assured me. "I just… I can't let you go without setting things straight between us."

"Oh… It's fine, Clark. We were both living without physical closeness for so long… we just lost control," I said.

"Is that it?" he asked.

"What more could it be? We wanted fun and we wanted to forget. That's all."

"Yeah, I guess so. I'm glad we're ok again," he said, but his voice seemed different somehow. Like it didn't really belong to him.

"Take care." I just touched his arm, not bothering with trying to decipher him and that was it. It wouldn't feel right if I hugged him. "Goodbye," I said and left.

Maybe we were ok, but I felt like we would never get back to what he had.

* * *

I'd been travelling for a year, never staying in one place for too long. I was seeing the world, tasting the cuisine, exercising, just living…

Guys hit on me very often, but I never dated them. I ignored them instead. Told them I wasn't waiting for a hook-up.

Finally, I stayed in Paris for a little longer than I intended. There weren't many things I wanted to see at this point. For the last year I'd covered pretty much everything I wanted. Now I could go to East, maybe see Russia or Ukraine, but it didn't appeal to me much. To India and China I'd been first.

I liked it here in Paris. The language was super difficult when it came to pronouncing, but I could talk in English and be more or less understood.

I'd spent Christmas alone and didn't even realize it was that day until I noticed the Christmas dinner in my hotel and discovered the closed shops. Not that I cared. It was just another Christmas out of hundreds I'd lived through. This one was nothing special since I had no one to spend it with. Surprisingly, I wasn't sad and that was when I discovered that I'd managed to make myself happy. I saved myself. I didn't need any help. I'd done it!

Once I realized it, I started smiling to nothing and no one in particular. Or I was just smiling to myself even if that made me crazy.

It was close to New Year's Eve and I thought I could start this new year with a new start.

I was just standing on the Eiffel Tower, one of my favorite spots in the city, because I could see the whole Paris from up here, then I heard him.

"You know, it's ok to be happy again," he said. "You deserve it."

I turned to him in shock and asked, "You've been following me?!"

"More like keeping tracks. I've just finally managed to catch you. It was hard."

I came back to my previous position by the rail and looked at the city below again.

"I stayed here longer than I should," I just said.

"Well, I'm happy, because thanks to that I caught up with you."

"Oliver… why are you doing this? Have you been tracking me the whole year?"

"Well… yeah. I left when I found out you were gone. I didn't want you to be alone."

"Maybe I wanted to be alone? I needed it!" I looked at him.

"I know. Clark told me. But I went anyway. There was nothing waiting for me at home, so maybe I just needed this trip as much as you did."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I got better. Have you?"

"Yes." I smiled broadly. "I think I did."

"Good. It's so good to see the smile on your face. You know, all this time I've been following you I kept thinking what I would tell you when I would finally see you and… I screwed up, Jess. I know I did, but if I'd said something when Lex came back those hundred plus years ago… would you have chosen me?"

He surprised me. He just went straight to the point and suddenly, I felt sorry for him. He must've wanted to talk to me so desperately and I just kept on running from him and everyone else.

"Of course not," he answered himself. Did he mean it as a rhetorical question? "You were too blinded and I couldn't hurt Chloe by leaving her as every other guy in her life did."

"You're too decent, Ollie," I signed. "So different than…"

"…Lex?" he finished after me. "I bet you're not used to it. You know that Clark is decent, but you never really believed Lex could be. He was selfish. He would put his own needs before the whole world."

I didn't say anything to that, because I knew it was true. I wasn't even angry at Oliver. This year I'd been thinking a lot. At the beginning I'd started remembering things I'd thought were long forgotten. The way we'd met, the way he'd used to look at me, kissed me, how he'd been trying to protect me by keeping me at distance, but I'd been stubborn. I'd wanted Lex and he'd finally caved. Maybe it'd been a mistake? All those memories had pained me, but then I'd starting realizing his character. Years ago I'd thought it to be sweet, protective and I'd seen after his death that it was actually dominative, possessive. And I'd been agreeing to that treatment, it'd made me ecstatic to let him possess me. It'd never been healthy, but yet, I'd been too silly I'd let him do that. I'd been… worshipping him, I realized with horrification. And worshipping a man wasn't normal or healthy.

"Lex did the right thing at the end," I finally spoke.

"Part of him, yes. He knew he had to die in order to save everyone," Oliver agreed. "At least, the good in him knew it."

We were silent for a moment. I could feel that Oliver didn't exactly want this conversation to go that way, but it was done and he couldn't take it back.

"I needed that time alone, because I wanted to find myself," I said, so he would stop blaming himself and just listen to me. "But I still don't know who I really am," I admitted.

It was the truth. I found happiness on my own in strangely little things. A cup of delicious coffee. A cookie. Good dinner. The way the sky looked a particular day. The rainbow. The scent of fresh air in the sea. A good make-up. A dress I was wearing. Money given to a poor person and their smile.

I hugged myself, because I got cold. We were right in the open and it was winding and snowing as it was December in Paris.

"Maybe I never really knew who I was," I continued. "I always thought I was destined to be a Luthor, but of course, now I know it was stupid of me to think that way."

"You were never a Luthor," Oliver finally said. "I've already told you that."

"I get it now," I agreed, "but who am I, really? A mother? A widow?"

"You're just… you," Ollie turned to me and looked me in the eye, "you're Jessica Hamby, the girl I once met and she never let go of my heart."

"I'm not sure I know what love is anymore, Ollie. I was thinking so hard and still, I don't know. If what I felt to Lex was pure desire and passion… and I was adamant in the knowledge that we were meant to be…" I shook my head. "Only we weren't. We were never meant to be. So what do I really know about love? I just know fire, desire, but then it burns out. It burnt out even between me and Lex. All I know is the love I have for my children, the maternal one."

"Well, luckily for you, you still have plenty of time to discover the other kinds," Oliver said.

"I thought of just dying, you know? But then I figured that I have to appreciate and value my life. I have it, so I have to do something with it."

"What would you say if I wanted to start a life with you now?" he asked me. "I'm not Lex and I am not asking you for a hundred years. I'm just asking for a lifetime."

"It's all relative those days, isn't it?" I laughed, reminding myself the kiss I'd shared with Oliver the night after Lex had died. I'd felt then. So much.

I reached my hand and touched his. It was cold, but began warming up under mine.

We looked at each other.

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**AN: **There's also another alternative - less serious - ending to this. You can read it when going to my short story called _**Jex - Alternative Ending**_


	2. Chapter 2

**AN:** Actually, as I now correct this fic to publish it… I hate it. I fucking hate it, because Lex is and should always be the one for Jess. Still, I won't delete it, it just took too much work. Treat it as an alternative and enjoy it if you can. The next one - _Eternal _- is much better though.

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_What is love?_

_How much love is in the mind?_

_How much in the body?_

_How much in the heart?_

_Love is what separates us from animals._

_Love means caring._

_Love means devotion._

_Love means not being alone. _

_Does it ever die?_

* * *

_Can a man love a woman for hundred years and never tell her...?_

* * *

**Part 2**

It'd been a couple of weeks and we were still in Paris. We didn't want to come back home and face everything that was waiting for us there. We just wanted to be left alone. Especially when I knew I couldn't be good friends with Clark anymore and I couldn't look Lois in the eye. Who else was there? Lily, Alex and Imra. Lily who hated me right now. Alex who hated me too. Both from entirely different reasons.

When Lily had found out about my relationship with Oliver, she'd been furious and probably still was. I understood that she'd loved Oliver's son, Connor, but he was dead now. She had no reason to hate me for dating a Queen, had she?

Alex still hated me for sticking that knife into his father's heart, even though, technically, it wasn't his father anymore. Lex had been gone and everyone knew it, everyone understood what had to be done, everyone except my son who still thought we would eventually find a way to put Lex back together so he could become the same person we'd all used to know. Only there really wasn't.

I actually missed Imra, but she preferred to keep her distance for now too. Not that she wanted to, but she was doing it for Alex. He would hate if she started talking to me behind his back. First, as she'd written to me, she needed to help him understand the truth. Suddenly, I thought she was just like I'd used to be once. Trying to save a man. I just hoped she would reach better results than I had.

It was early, but I couldn't sleep once I woke up. The light coming through the window was too bright, yet I didn't want to close the curtains. It was 8.30, a beautiful morning in Paris. And I wanted a delicious croissant.

I turned myself in bed, looking at my companion. He was still sleeping and I didn't want to wake him up.

I thought he was so beautiful while just laying in bed, naked, his perfect body bathed in the rising sun, his golden hair and hazel eyes if he opened them.

I loved him.

Few months back I would've never suspected it would happen to me again. At least not so fast.

I knew Lex had been an easy choice for me and I'd refused to open my eyes for any other kind of love. I'd chosen the desire and passion I'd felt for him and taken it for obvious love. I'd let the fate decide for me. Or I'd just thought it was fate, because it really wasn't.

I'd always cared about Oliver. I'd meant it the first time I'd told him I loved him when Lex had been dead all those hundred plus years ago. But I'd still chosen the easy way. I'd still chosen Lex.

I'd run to Lex and let him take control over me, let him dominate me.

We all wanted love, but then when it was real, we were afraid. So afraid of this pure kind of love. I had to admit it had nothing to do with fire and desire of flesh, but once spoken, the desire was there. I experienced it all with Oliver.

Watching his face, I came back in my mind to the moment he'd found me on the Eiffel Tower that memorable winter night.

* * *

_Few weeks earlier_

I covered his cold hand with mine to give him hope, to make him understand that maybe, just maybe I was up to his proposal. Maybe I did feel for him and maybe I did have to explore that territory.

He noticed I was cold when I started shivering and he put his arms around me, placing a soft kiss on my head.

"Do you have a place to stay?" I asked.

"I checked in in your hotel," he told me.

"Alright. Let's go then. It's really getting cold."

He didn't push me, didn't suggest anything, but once we found ourselves in the warm inside of the hotel, I didn't let go of his hand, on the contrary, I squeezed it gently and led him straight to my apartment.

When the door was closed behind us, I looked up at his face, into his hazel eyes, then at his lips.

They parted and he looked at me questioningly like he wanted my approval until he would make the next move.

I smiled and came closer to him, gently kissing him on the mouth. I was surprised by the enormosity of the feelings I was experiencing.

He got my assent and he kissed me fully but slowly like he was savoring in the taste of my lips. His eyes were closed and as he put his hands to my face. I could feel them shaking slightly.

I knew he was consumed by fire, but yet, he kept stopping himself. He was breathing me in. His lips slowly touching the skin on my neck. The fire engulfed me too. I didn't protest though that he was erratic but agonizingly slow at the same time. He'd been waiting for this for so long that maybe he needed it to be slow, he needed it to be perfect. And yes, it was.

He was so different than Lex. I knew Oliver wanted to take me, but he was savoring me. Lex would just take me fast and hard, right there on the spot. Oliver was taking his time, trying to show me how much he loved me and respected me. He didn't try to dominate me, to show me his power over me. He treated me as equal.

And I liked it so much. I needed it like that. I needed that purity of his love. I needed light, because I'd been so long with someone so dark.

He started kissing my lips again. Then I felt his tongue coxing my mouth, so I opened it and when we met, I moaned, put my arms around him, needed to feel him against me, but first I took off his coat.

He did the same to me until we were finally standing in our indoor clothes.

I slid my hands along his arms and notice something different about him.

I lifted the shirt of off him and he stood right in front of me, half naked.

I almost moaned again.

"Wow… you're more muscular than usual," I noticed. His body was, indeed, transformed.

He'd always had it perfect and chiseled, but now he was more bulky, his arms were more muscular, everything about him seemed bigger than I remembered.

"I packed up more than usual," he admitted in a husky voice. "I've been chasing you for so long that I needed to work off my frustration."

"Can't say I'm complaining." I smiled to him coquettishly.

He began kissing me again, this time with more passion, faster. I also felt him pushing on to me and toward the bedroom.

He must've changed his mind, because suddenly he lifted me up and carried there himself.

He slowly undressed me, kissing my body, making me feel loved and special. He wasn't pushy, he was just… perfect.

When he finally entered me, he was barely holding on. His body already bathed in sweat that was shining on his biceps and making me crazy with desire. He propped himself on his hands on each side of me as not to crash me. The strain in his muscles was such a great view to me.

He was almost shaking as I could tell he fought himself as not to push hard and fast and just come. He wanted to please me first.

If that didn't make me love him…

"Hundred plus years of waiting…" he whispered when he captured my lips again, his hard member inside of me, torturing me, because he was moving so slowly, his hand on my breast.

"Ollie, faster… I need it faster…" I was already crazy with desire and I didn't really care how fast he would go, I just needed to get there.

And he delivered perfectly.

We almost came together, him following me with a roar.

And it was amazing and powerful and so full of love that I couldn't comprehend it.

Then he took me into his arms and we just stayed together, breathless, him still inside of me.

"Well, not exactly hundred years…" I complained when I finally could think. "You wanted to say you waited for this after hundred years of making love to Chloe."

"We stopped with Chloe right after Connor was born," Oliver confessed.

"Really?" I needed to raise myself up for this and look at him. "Why? You were both attractive."

"So what?" he asked, putting a wet strand of my hair behind my ear. "We just didn't bother. We were living in our own small worlds."

"I'm sorry. I wish you said something sooner," I told him.

"It wouldn't have change anything," he answered and he had a point there.

There was nothing really left to be said, so we came back to cuddling. Being close to him and giving him my love in exchange for his was all I could do. I was done with sacrificing myself for a man or worshipping him for that matter.

Later, when we recovered, I did something special for him. Well, at least it was a big deal for me because I'd done that for no one but Lex in the past. It'd never worked with others even when Lex had been dead. I know, I'd tried with Clark.

I gave Oliver a blow job. Something broke in me and I felt so free. Free of Lex dominating me, free of getting hot when I had to kneel in front of him. I just… I did it to Oliver when feeling free of all those feelings and I felt so happy.

I'd subconsciously wanted to serve and Lex had been my master. It was disgusting, I thought now. Why had I been so stupid? Why had I been letting him do this to me? I'd been on my knees so many times, cherishing Lex's body, loving his cock for a Christ's sake!, worshiping. I'd been behaving like I was less than he was. His hand always fisted in my hair, guiding me. Yet, it'd all been turning me on.

Well, it was over now. I was done being something less. I was an equal partner in this relationship with Oliver. He treated me like one and I'd never been happier.

Everyone needed to get over the bad boy stage. I only regretted that it took so long for me. Maybe Lex had been right in one thing: maybe the living forever part was prolonging every single process. Especially getting mature.

* * *

When we finally got to the part when I asked about the people I left in Smallville, I found out a few interesting things.

"Imra's in charge of Watchtower now. That's her job. The rest of the Legion help," Oliver told me when I was lying into his arms the next morning.

"The _family," _he said, because clearly, there weren't blood family, "was super mad at me for leaving. At you too."

"Well, that part I know pretty well, trust me," I said bitterly.

"You shouldn't blame yourself. You did what had to be done."

"I know, but it still hurts."

"There's one more thing you should know."

"And what's that?"

"It's about Lara."

"Did something happen?" I got scared. There was enough death to last me for a lifetime.

"No, but… they discovered something about her and it finally made Lois stop trying to convince Clark to make an army of superchildren."

"What is it?" I prompted, getting impatient.

"Lara actually doesn't have superpowers. She will never be as strong as her father. Part of her is still Lois, a human. Emil did some research and it turns out that she will never be invincible like Clark, even the sun won't help her with that. She is more immune and stronger than normal people, but bullets will either kill her or seriously bruise."

"Oh, that is sad, but… I think it's better this way."

"Yeah, Clark thinks that too, but Lois…" Ollie's voice trailed off significantly.

"It's natural for a mother to worry. Lois would like Lara to be invincible, because then nothing could hurt her."

"Even Clark can be hurt. Inside," Oliver said and he had a good point there. Again.

"Yeah, inside he was always human," I agreed with a heavy sigh.

* * *

Clark actually flew once to check up on us, but I did not really talk to him. It was more like Oliver and Clark chatting when I was there for a moment and then I wasn't, because I left.

* * *

_Now_

I was watching his face, reminiscing and then, I remembered the last night when I'd told Oliver I loved him.

I did not regret a thing. I really didn't. Life was a really mysterious thing. I could never, even after so many years, predict it. Maybe it was what made it so special.

I remembered the exact words I'd said, totally out of the blue, surprising Oliver, "I love you, Ollie. I am so in love with you." Then I'd smiled and started crying. It hadn't been pretty, I guessed, but it'd meant the world to Oliver.

I'd been and still was so exhilarated to feel this. This love as it felt so real.

Then he'd responded, "I've been waiting for you to say that and mean it for over a hundred years. Ever since I saw you, ever since you called me to help you find Clark."

"Oh, you're so loving it, aren't you?" I'd laughed. "Aren't you proud of how long it's been?" I teased him.

"Yeah, you want to know why? Because then it must be real. You must be the one for me if it still lasts. And I'm not bored with you."

"Hmm… you haven't been having sex with me before so…"

"This has nothing to do with sex," he'd said genuinely.

"I know, honey, I know."

Ollie finally opened his eyes and caught me staring and smiling as I was pondering over the night before.

"Hey, love," I told him and kissed him.

"I love you too," he told me when I pulled away.

"Get up, I'm hungry," I immediately told him and he laughed.

* * *

My life seemed to be a constant vacation recently, I realized after another hot session with Ollie in bed. Now we were both cuddling, naked under a duvet while there was snowing outside. I didn't even know which day of the week it was or which date for that matter.

Good I knew it was February. Probably the end of it, though.

"You know, I can say that I'm totally happy with you here," I told him. "Thank you."

"For what?" he asked and kissed the top of my head because it was the closest part of me to his lips now.

"For showing up like you did. For tracking me."

"The pleasure is all mine."

In that very moment Oliver's cell rang.

"Who could call you right now?" I got interested because it was really uncommon. He was dealing with his business via the Internet as I was doing the same with JeXCorp, although Alex and Lily were in charge, so I didn't have that many responsibilities.

Oliver growled theatrically and reached for his pants, that were on the floor, to grab his cell.

"It'd better be good!" he yelled. "Oh… hi, Clark… wait… what? Alright. We'll be there." He hang up.

"What is it?" I asked him in a worried voice. "Oliver?" I repeated.

"Clark wants us to go home ASAP," he notified, "but he refused to tell us why."

"Well, that's just great!" I huffed, getting out of bed. "Does he really think I won't be worried if I don't know?!"

"Jessica, calm down," Oliver told me and that actually worked.

"We're just… we've been through enough pain, Ollie. I don't know if I can handle more."

"I get that, I really do and trust me, I feel the same way, but we have to go back. Besides, how long it's been since you saw your kids?"

"They don't want to see me," I confessed. "And I don't want to see the hatred on their faces."

"Jess." Oliver also stood up and it made me hard to concentrate as he was still naked. "Hey," he took my chin between his fingers and raised it to meet my eyes. "None of what happened was your fault. It was the Locians' fault and Lex's. He did this to his kids and to you. You just needed to make the world a better place again."

"Well, I know, but Lily is mad at me for being with you."

"You don't honestly want to tell me that she likes me?" Oliver was bewildered for a moment there. Actually, if he hadn't been there while she'd been growing up, it would've been a possibility. They were both adults now and they lived forever thanks to VA, thanks to Clark. I bet there was many couples like that in the world.

"No, eh!" I voiced my disgust. "She knows we were close in the past, so of course, not! She hates me, because I got together with you when she lost Connor, who was…"

"…my son," Oliver finished. "You know, sometimes I wonder why is it that we agreed to take VA in the first place. Ok, it cured all the diseases…"

"…and the side effect is eternal life, so of course, the humanity took it with no thinking of the repercussions," I finished after him. "What can we do now, Ollie? It's done."

"Yeah, I know. Let's go. We need to hurry. Clark wouldn't want us back with no reason."

* * *

The fact that Clark did not fly for us to take us home was enough to worry me. It meant that he had his hands full of job.

We arrived at Watchtower tired and exhausted, but once we stood by the door, I forgot about those factors because adrenaline kicked in. I was scared. I was seriously scared of what I would find in there.

Maybe I didn't have to worry so much. No one really looked at me in a bad way.

Clark, Lois, Imra and Lily were there.

And Imra was crying while Lily was comforting her.

"What happened?" I asked, taking in this picture, feeling something unpleasant tying in my stomach. I knew somehow that whatever had happened over a year ago, wasn't quite finished and it unsettled me.

"Finally! I'm so happy to see you, guys!" Lois exclaimed and ran to us, hugging me and then Oliver. "Are you alright? Have you got here safely?"

"Yes, as you can see," Oliver answered. "What's going on? The not-knowing part was driving Jess mad."

"Well, it's a delicate matter and I thought I shouldn't tell you over the phone," Clark started explaining.

"Did something happen to Alex?!" I panicked. Seeing Imra crying was enough to come to that conclusion.

"No… or maybe… yes," Clark corrected, "but not in a way you may think. There was no accident, he just…"

"He's his father," I heard a manly voice I couldn't quite put it to a right person even though it sounded familiar.

Rokk, who was standing in the shadows behind Imra and Lily, showed himself.

"What?!" I yelled, seeing all the possible scenarios in which Alex became Lex and probably, all of them was accurate. "No… he wouldn't…" But then I came to a realization that he actually would. Lex had once told me about the second time his mother had visited him. He'd been drinking, but everything she'd showed him had come true. Well, the better version of his future had. The bad one contained Lex killing Chloe, Oliver, me, Clark… then raising our son to become the exact imagine of himself until Alex killed Lex in the process.

Of course, the future had changed drastically, so the details had changed too, but...

"Oh, my god," I covered my mouth with my hands and walked over to a chair by the computer and fell in it.

"Jess, what is it?" Oliver got to me immediately. "Are you ok? What can I do?"

"I… I should've remembered… I should've known…" I kept on mumbling and I knew that none of them understood me.

"What?" Clark persisted. "Jess, if you know something…"

Lois handed me a glass of water and I drank it with appreciation. Then I was finally able to talk.

I told them everything. The whole process of Lex converting himself to the good side. How he'd refused to change and how I'd left him all those years ago, right after he'd come back to life and started conducting his usual experiments again. I told them about me leaving him and him drinking that night and seeing his mother. Lillian had showed him two possible futures and he'd chosen the one full of love. Only she hadn't showed him anything past the normal human life. She hadn't told him he would discover a way to live forever thanks to Clark's blood.

"That explains a lot," Lois admitted, "but honey, still… it's not your fault."

"Of course, it's not. We couldn't have foreseen it and even if, we couldn't have just locked Alex because of something he might or might not do," Clark agreed.

"What has he done exactly?" I asked the perfect question.

"Broke my heart," came from Imra.

"What did he do?"

"He… I noticed there was something wrong with him and I wasn't a fool. I knew your and Lex's story, Jessica, so I looked closer and I found out… Alex is the spitting image of his father. His behavior, the things he kept telling me… he took over JeXCorp and started conducting dubious experiments, he's also trying to get in contact with Locians even though the Council strongly forbids it."

"Did he kill anyone?" I asked again.

"No one we know," Lily said. "Mum… I know this is not the time to say it, but I'm so sorry," she suddenly changed the topic. "I just… I needed to tell you that I love you and I understand you now. Seeing Imra and Alex… I understand that you just want to be happy."

"Oh, honey, I'm happy you do," I told her and got up, went to her and gave her a hug.

"We believe that Alex killed a few members of JeXCorp and a few scientists. They opposed him so naturally, they had to be eliminated," Rokk explained.

I closed my eyes, feeling pain once again.

Then there was no coming back for Alex. Or maybe was there?

"Imra, why did he break your heart? How?"

"I tried to stop him, to make him realize that what he was doing was wrong and then I threatened that I would leave him. He said… he said that I should just go on with it, that he, unlike his father, would not change for a woman."

"I'm really sorry, Imra. I wish I could know earlier. Maybe that would spare you falling for him," I told her. The way Rokk just looked at Imra did not miss my attention. It was like all those looks Oliver had been giving me that no one had noticed, even me. Rokk was in love with Imra. I could tell.

"It's not your fault. We don't have any control over whom we're falling in love with," she told me. "I know I'm you and Alex is Lex. The history tends to repeat itself, doesn't it?"

"Yeah…" I sighed heavily. "It does. No matter how hard we try to prevent it."

"What do we do?" Oliver asked. "Obviously, we need to stop him. Any ideas where he might be?"

"JeXCorp?" I suggested.

"No," Imra denied. "He kept disappearing on me those past few days and I never figured out to where. I already checked the new assets of the company, but they didn't tell me anything."

"Then we'll just look for him. Lois, keep checking the street cameras. Ollie, you can suit up as Green Arrow and come with me."

"I can help too," Rokk offered. "And I'll call Garth."

"Great. Do that."

"Oliver?" I walked over to him, cupped his face in my hands and kissed him briefly. "Be careful."

"I will. I finally have something to lose, so don't worry. I won't get myself killed," he promised and then kissed me again.

I saw Rokk disappearing behind a door leading to the stash of all the gadgets Chloe had acquired over the years. I so wished she could've been here with us now.

I followed him.

"Rokk?" I said his name and he turned to me, pretty surprised.

"Yeah?"

"Don't take this the wrong way," I warned him. "I really don't want to pry into other people's affairs, especially when I'm not that close to them, but… you're in love with Imra, aren't you?" I just asked straight away.

First he was shocked that I figured it out, but then he just sighed.

"Is it that obvious?"

"Not really," I told him, so he could be relieved. "I just see in you Oliver from before he and I got together. You should tell her how you feel."

"She would never choose me over Alex," Gokk said, very sure of himself.

"Oliver told me the same about me and Lex and just look where I am now. I am with him. In love."

"She's just got her heart broken."

"I know and you can't just go over there now and blurt out that you have feelings for her. For now, be there for her and then, when she gets better, you need to tell her the truth. Do not wait a hundred years, ok?"

"Alright," he agreed and even smiled a little. "Jessica…" he called my name when I was about to leave.

"Yes?" I turned back to him.

"Thank you. You know, for caring."

"My pleasure. I always care about my friends and Imra is one. If you ever need an advice, just talk to me."

"I will. I appreciate this only… There's one more thing. Why are you doing this? Alex is your son. Don't you want him to be happy?"

"I can tell what's real love when I see it," I admitted sadly. "I wish I could've known earlier that there was nothing I could do to save Lex. I love Alex, I do, but all those things that happened recently… I just don't know if I ever be able to save him. It hurts, it really hurts, but also… once you get past a certain point, you can deal with more pain. Besides, if Alex is meant to treat Imra as Lex treated me… not that it was bad, but there were some disturbing things I realized just a few months ago and I don't want Imra to go through that too," I finished, quite awkwardly.

"I hope he'll be alright. For your sake."

"Thanks."

As I walked out of this room I wondered why it was happening again. _Why?!_

I'd been in Paris a day ago. In a beautiful, romantic city with the man I loved and I hadn't had any problems.

Now, everything was catching up with me like it was a punishment for running away.


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

"What do you mean he's got off the grid?!" I yelled at Clark, furious. I could swear I'd never been so fucking angry with him before in my life. "How the fuck could you let that happen?!" I kept on screaming at him. "You knew how much he meant to me! You knew that another death would kill me!"

"Jess, he is not dead…"

"…yet!" I finished, grabbed the chair nearby and threw it at the opposite wall. "Alex will kill him and then what?! I won't stand my son killing the man I love!"

"Oh, so you're so in love with him now?!" Clark suddenly raised his voice too. "He chased you all the way to France and found after a fucking year when you gave us no sign that you were alive and you suddenly love him?! He's your rebound guy, Jess!"

"When the fuck did you go from 'oh, I'm sorry, but I lost, Oliver, Jess' to accusing me of taking a trip to Europe when I needed it?!" I couldn't believe him! Who the fuck Clark thought he was?!

"It wasn't a trip! You ran away from your life and your problems!"

"I needed time to myself! I'd been with Lex for over a hundred years, so don't you think it was easy to forget it and just move on!"

"But you didn't love him anymore! Did you?!"

We were standing right in front of each other, screaming our throats out and now we fell into silence. We just kept looking at each other and Clark was as full of energy as I was now. I felt like I could kill someone I was so angry.

Suddenly, I got the impression that he would either kiss me like he'd done that memorable night when he'd come to visit me after Tess's death or go on screaming some more at me.

I didn't like the first option. We were both not in our right minds.

"Would you stop already?" Thank God for Lois coming in here on time! I thought when I heard her voice. "Oliver is gone, ok, but you can't just stand there and keep accusing each other! You need to get out and fight! You need to get him back!"

"Yes, that is exactly what I'm going to do!" I agreed with her and finally cut the eye contact with Clark. I had to admit, he'd been acting really weird recently and I didn't know why.

"You can't go out there alone!" Clark tried to stop me.

"Watch me!"

"Jess?" Lois spoke again. "This time I'm with Mr. Superman here. You shouldn't go alone."

"I'm Alex's mother, so I am the one who can figure out where he is!"

In that very moment my cell rang.

"It's Lily," I said. "Yes, honey?" I picked it up.

"Mom… he took me," I heard my daughter's panicked voice.

"What? Honey, who took you?" I asked just to make sure, because I already knew the answer.

"Alex. He's changed, mom. He's not my brother… I… I don't know who he is anymore…"

I knew. He was Lex. The evil Luthor. But Lily couldn't know because luckily for her, she'd never seen her dad showing Luthors' true colors.

"If he has you…" I suddenly spoke with horrification, "then why are you calling me? Did he let you contact me?"

"He… he wants you here and only you. He… He has Oliver, mom. He's gonna hurt him if you don't show up. You can't tell Clark or anyone."

"Alright. Where are you?"

Surprisingly, they were at the mansion, in the cellar.

I hung up.

"Jess?" Clark asked.

"It's nothing. I… I need to go…" I said and grabbed my purse.

As I was passing by him, he grabbed my wrist.

"Aren't you forgetting something? Superhearing?" he hinted.

"Clark… I can't… I need to go alone," I said, strangely quiet under the power of his touch. When was the last time he'd actually touched me? When he'd come to say goodbye when I'd been on the airport? And before that…

I felt hot. Too hot. I took my hand away and said to him, "This is Oliver and my children we're talking about. Please, I need to take care of this alone. I can't let Alex him kill anyone else and I can't lose anyone else either."

"I can take them all out of there in no time," Clark was being stubborn.

"Yes, but then what? There will be no coming back for my son. I need to try talk to him first. If you want, you can stay in the distance, listening on and you can intervene only and I repeat _only _if you know someone is going to die soon. Any empty threat from Alex, any attempt of aiming at someone… you stay put, do you understand? You're fast enough to sweep in in the last moment, aren't you?"

He just nodded, finally agreeing to my demands.

"Good. Wish me luck."

And I walked out that door.

* * *

I hadn't been in the mansion since… I didn't even remember… or… yeah, probably since I'd seen the sex tape Eve Tessmacher had sent me. When I'd realized Lex hadn't been my Lex anymore.

It didn't make me feel any better. It was just the opposite. I was sad and hurt. All my life, ever since I'd come to Smallville as a teenager, was connected to this very place, to Lex, to Luthors. Now it wasn't anymore and I felt more lost than ever. The only time when I didn't feel like I didn't belong or when I stopped thinking who I really was and what was my purpose was when I was with Oliver.

That was why I needed to get him back now.

I walked past the study door, past the stairs leading upstairs to all the bedrooms. Instead, I walked down the stairs leading to the cellar. It was cold. Luthors had used it as a wine cellar, keeping all the precious and rarest bottles here.

And then, at the end of the long corridor, I noticed lights.

There were doors on each sides of me, hiding another and another wine collection, but I went straight ahead where I knew Alex was.

I found him standing in the middle of an empty room. All there was there were two chairs. To one Lily was tied up and she seemed unscathed, but to the other…

"Oliver!" I exclaimed his name in horror as I saw his bloody figure.

I go to him in no time and gently cupped his face.

"Ollie, are you alright?"

There was a moan coming from his mouth, but then he opened his eyes and looked at me, more conscious.

"Yeah, just peachy. Nothing that I haven't been through before." He actually managed to wink at me.

"Stay away from him!" I heard Alex.

"Or what?" I stood straight and covered Oliver with my own body, my back was to him now, so I was facing my son. "Could you really do it, Alex? Could you just kill and kill with no remorse? Do you have any idea what that will do to your soul? Your father wasn't a hero! He begged me to take his life, because he couldn't live with what his evil side did!"

"Well, you should've kept him alive anyway! We all can live forever! Few more centuries and he would've been just as new!"

"No, he wouldn't have," I denied, trying to keep calm. "It would've never gone away. Murder cannot be just wiped out by time. Not even by forever, Alex. Most importantly, the people who love you… How are they feeling right now? I am devastated, Alex. I am devastated that my son turned into this… this sociopath."

"Shut up!" Alex roared. "Just shut up!"

"She's right, Alex," Lily suddenly spoke. "Just look at yourself. Look at what you've done with your life. Imra will never forgive you and I know you love her with all that is left of your heart."

"Listen to your sister, Alex, think about Imra," I picked up the topic.

"I don't need Imra who's worshipping you!" Alex pointed me. "And I don't need you, because you gave up on dad! And you… you did it too!" He pointed Lily. "You hated him!"

"For killing the man I loved!"

"Doesn't matter! He was right. Queens shouldn't be with Luthors! You shouldn't be with him!" He shouted while pointed me and Oliver.

I discreetly handed Oliver a pocket knife as I kept standing with my back to him. Fortunately, he was conscious enough to take it from me.

"Alex, I was never a Luthor, not by blood, but… you are. You need to fight that evil part in you…" I started again.

"Don't call my father's legacy evil! It's not evil!"

"But it is. Do you have any idea what LuthorCorp was build on?" I asked him. "Yes, your father and I changed the name to JeXCorp, but it doesn't matter. Lionel Luthor, your grandfather, built this empire for money he got from insurance company after he killed his parents. Alex, he told his friend, Morgan Edge to set a fire to the building they were sleeping in and then he divided the money the insurance company paid. Lionel built LuthorCorp on blood and deception. Don't let the Luthor blood destroy you too."

"You need to choose," Alex told me like he didn't hear what I'd just said. "Me or him!" He pushed me away from Oliver who was still sitting like he was tied up. I hoped he freed himself and just pretended. "Would you really sacrifice your child, your first born son, for _him_?" Alex asked. "He's nothing. He's a Queen! He was bullying my father when they were kids!"

"Everyone makes mistakes, Alex," I told him, doing my best to be as calm as possible, "but what we do about it later, that is what defines us. Oliver understood it was wrong and he did something about it. You, on the other hand, are doing the exact opposite. Revenge will not lead you anywhere. It will kill you."

"I don't think so! I can do what my father always wanted to do! I can rule this world!"

"Power is not the answer. You will only wind up alone and bitter and evil," I tried again.

I'd already done that once for a fuck's sake! I'd managed to fix Lex! Why did I have to go through this again?! And I really didn't understand why the same happened to Alex. I'd raised him well. I'd raised him in a loving home! Why, then? Was a Luthor blood really a poison?

"Well, I have a surprise for you…" He turned around and grabbed a book that was lying nearby. "I stole that from Zatanna Zatara, you might remember her."

"What are you going to do with this?" I asked, because I really didn't like the sound of it.

"Oh, you will see. It will be spectacular!"

In the same time Clark flew to the cellar.

I screamed when Alex waved his hand, fast enough like he enhanced himself with the spell book and… Clark was imprisoned in some strangle multicolored bubble.

"Clark!" I wanted to get to him, but the bubble wouldn't let me.

Then Oliver jumped out of his chair and threw himself at Alex.

The same happened to him.

I could just stand there, looking at my son, terrified of what he was capable of.

Could he really kill everyone in this room, including Clark? What he was going to do with the spell book?

* * *

My question was answered almost immediately when Alex opened the spell book on a marked page and started chanting.

Both Clark and Oliver started getting weak like Alex was slowly taking their energy.

"Alex, stop it! Stop! You're hurting them!" I screamed at him.

I made a step forward to him, wanting to knock him out, but he waved his hand and I found myself immobilized. I wasn't engulfed in a bubble like Oliver and Clark were, but I couldn't move my legs.

Then there was this illuminating light and a silhouette of someone coming toward us.

"Oh, dear god! No!" I screamed at Alex when I made out the shape of a bald head and then… it was Lex's spirit.

"Alex, think about what you're doing!" Clark yelled. "I saw Zatanna doing it once! You can only bring someone back when you give a life in return! It's not right!"

"Shut up!" Alex answered back. "That's the point, isn't it? Mom…" He turned to me. "You will either watch your lover here die, so dad can be with us again or you will watch your best friend die!"

"Alex, this is wrong!" I said instead of daring to choose. Was he crazy?

"Alexander Junior Luthor, what on earth are you doing?" Lex asked and there was silence.

We were all too shocked to say a word, too shocked to see him, even if he was transparent as it was only his spirit.

"This is my gift to you, dad. I'm honoring your legacy. You can live again." Alex turned to Lex proudly.

"And what makes you think I want this? What makes you think I want to watch my child turning into the spitting image of the darkest version of myself and my father?" Lex asked.

I started realizing something. Could it be…

"Lex?" I dared to address him in a shaky voice, although I was scared that he would be mad at me for ending his life, for giving up on him. "Lex, is that… really you?" I asked.

I knew it sounded silly, but there was something about him that was so familiar and so dear to me that I was almost sure it was _my _Lex and not the evil or good part of him. He was whole now. He was who he'd been through a hundred years of our relationship.

"Yes, Jessica, it is me."

"Alex is crazy. Please, help me save him! He already killed people and broke Imra's heart! He wants to be you, only… the bad you. He's willing to kill Clark or Oliver just to bring you back."

"Isn't it wonderful, father? I bet you want to get rid of the Queen! Once we do that, there will be no Queens anymore in this world! How do like the sound of it?" Alex turned to Lex, so sure that his father was happy about what he was doing.

I wasn't so sure though. I knew Lex all too well not to see the obvious signs in his expression. He didn't like it just like I didn't.

"Alexander, this is not the way," Lex told his son in a calm voice.

"What…? What?" Alex didn't seem to comprehend his father's answer. "But you can live again! You can live forever! We can conquer the world together! The whole universe!"

"I don't want to live again. I meant it when I told your mother that I shouldn't have risen from the dead the first time."

"But… no!" Alex was baffled and seemed not to know what to do. He was sure that Lex would say yes and the actual answer completely destroyed his plan.

"Lex, I am so, so deeply sorry for what I have done," I turned to him now, finally gathering the courage in myself to talk to him like this and apologize. I realized that I would never have this chance again and I needed to use it. At least one good thing could come out of Alex's madness.

"No, dear," Lex denied, "I am the one who is sorry. I'm sorry for doing this to us. I am sorry for ruining our life together."

"It wasn't your fault," I told him with tears in my eyes.

"Partially, it was. It was always there in me. I know I was always dominating. It was my nature and I couldn't do anything about it. I am sorry about that too. I also know that now you are with Oliver and I just want you to know that I'm alright with it. All I ever wanted for you was to be happy."

"Lex…" I whispered, being at a complete loss for words.

"But… no…" Alex mumbled, still in shock.

"Listen to me, his powers weaken," Lex pointed our son. "I was evil in nature and I know it. There was nothing you could have done to change it or to save me. You did enough for me all those years ago and I am grateful for being with you, but now it's over. I destroyed it. I know nothing will ever erase that and I can only hope that someone else will give you more happiness than I ever could. You deserve light, Jessica, not darkness. You've always belonged to the light and I was lucky it was shining on my darkness for so long… Oliver, I am sorry for taking your wife and son away from you. Please, tell Emil that I am sorry for taking Tess from him. I deeply regret it and I will always try to atone for those sins and for all the others I killed."

Alex started shaking like he was still trying to keep Lex's spirit here, bound to both Oliver and Clark, but his power was weakening as Lex was adamant in not coming back. I guessed that one couldn't bring someone back when they didn't want to be brought back.

" Jessica, I want you to go and take from life everything you want. I love you. I will always lo…" In that very moment the connection was broken and Lex was gone as well as the bubbles. I could finally move, but I didn't. I was shaking and crying. It was all too much for me.

Oliver was the one who got to Alex, that was now on his knees, depleted of all his strength, and knocked him out. The spell book hit the floor and closed.

"Jess? Jessica?" Oliver finally got to me and put his hands on my arms. "Are you ok?" He took me into his embrace and I sobbed with my face in the crook of his neck, smelling blood.

That woke me up. Oliver was hurt. We needed to get him to a doctor.

Lex just told me how much he really cared about me and loved me. But still, it wasn't enough. It'd never been. And I accepted that. I really did. Sometimes there were things stronger than love itself.

Right now I was in love with Oliver and I finally got the closure I needed. I'd thought that I would get it by traveling and discovering myself, but that had failed. I still had no idea who I was. I just knew I could live without Lex and maybe, just maybe, he wasn't really the love of my life.

My whole life changed. My world changed. My perspective shifted.

And guess, what? I was still standing. Stronger than ever.

* * *

Years went by and this time, we were actually counting them.

Right after Alex had been thrown into jail (there had really been nothing we could've done. He hadn't changed his mind about his father and he'd hated me), I and Oliver had stopped taking the VA.

I was still tired of living. Tired of fighting.

Oliver's presence did not make it any better. I just had a person to go through life with. A life I was hoping would one day finally end.

Clark had been working hard on Lex's legacy project and a planet similar to Earth had been eventually discovered. Now he'd been working on preparing it for humans.

Lois and Lara had stayed on Earth while Clark had been gone, Lara still half-human half-Kryptonian, not really able to fit in anywhere and she would've started aging if not for the VA given to her in time.

I hardly ever saw Clark as he was somewhere out there, in the space, and I also hardly saw Lois. All of us had been bound together so tightly once, like one big family and now… now we were separated.

Even Lily found her own place in the world as she was now engaged to Rokk. That actually was a great news. I only wanted her to find happiness again and it looked like she had. I was also happy for Rokk, because I could tell he finally found his happiness.

As we came back with Oliver from my daughter and Rokk's wedding, I came to a realization that I did not want to die after all.

"Ollie," I turned to him with shining eyes. It maybe was depressing, but I still had no idea what real love meant. All I'd known was to be in love with Lex and Oliver and those were so different feelings that I wasn't sure of anything right now. I needed Oliver just as much as he needed me. Without each other we wouldn't have the strength to carry on. I loved him, I knew that, but was I really _in love _with him? "Ollie, let's start taking the VA again," I told him, ignoring those thoughts about love for the moment.

I felt like there was still something missing, like my destiny was so much greater than I could now imagine. I knew it was silly, because what else could I do in this world? But I went with my guts on that. That feeling was distant like I still needed a lot of time to figure out my real place and I couldn't do it if I died.

"What?" Oliver was surprised.

"I need more time, Ollie. I need… _you_," I said and it was the truth. I couldn't go on alone, not anymore, I needed him.

He looked at me with a smile and I could actually notice his eyes getting a little teary.

"Me too," he said honestly and I found myself frowning.

"Then why did you agree to all of this?" I asked, not understanding a thing. "Why didn't you say you didn't want to stop taking the VA?"

"Don't you know? I would do anything for you. I just… I thought you never stopped loving Lex despite what you told yourself and I thought you wanted to die to join him in the afterlife if such exists."

He wasn't right. It wasn't about Lex, but it was my destructive behavior nevertheless. I'd wanted to die, I'd wanted it to just end, so I wouldn't have to fight for survival anymore, but I'd been a coward while thinking like that.

"Lex would want me to go on and live," I said. "And that is what I have to do. I can't give up now. And don't you doubt me like that. What you did, Ollie… giving it all up for me… Lex would never do it and you know it. He would never give up his eternal life."

"Well, I think the Lex you loved would, for you, but still… thank you."

I didn't think Oliver was right about Lex. He would never give up his eternal life and he would never let me give it up either, even if he had to add VA to my coffee every morning, waiting for me to change my mind.

"No, I thank _you_," I told him. "Thanks to you I am not alone. I have somebody to go through life with, somebody I love."

* * *

"So that really changed you mind? You just felt like you were giving up by not taking the VA?" Oliver asked later when we were in bed.

"That and so many other factors," I admitted. "I was at my daughter's wedding and I realized I wanted to see her and Rokk happy, going through life together. I want maybe. Maybe I want to see my son understanding he made a mistake. Maybe he'll realize it on time and still get to get VA?" I wondered out loud and felt a tingle of pain in my heart. Alex would die as a mortal, in jail. That was the most probable scenario, but I could dream, couldn't I? And still, I had his lifetime to see him. "I want to explore what we have further," I added. "And there are the little factors too. I love the senses that surround me. Who knows what you experience in the afterlife and if there is anything to experience after all, maybe it's just peace. And I don't want that. I want to taste and smell coffee every morning. I want to keep eating chocolate. I love… life. In the past I would've never suspected I could go on like that, but somehow… I do. I am fine and I am truly happy… Well, ok, I still feel weird when I think of my potential destiny, like there was something awaiting me, but… maybe there is no destiny, you know? Maybe there are just choices we make."

Oliver chuckled.

"You know, I feel that too. And I love life too. I was in the dark with you after losing my family, but then I realized they would want me to go on." His stroked my arm as I lay in his embrace.

"Yeah…" I admitted. "So we're doing it. We're living," I decided an shifted in bed to look him in the eye. "Together."

"I thought Lex's ghost would always haunt us, that you would never be one hundred percent committed to me and… I feel like I was wrong," Ollie admitted.

"Lex let me go and I let him go. Once, I thought the worst thing that could happen to me was losing him, but I lived through it and I guess I realized I can actually survive anything. I am fully committed to you, Oliver, and I am free of the Luthors' power," I reassured him.

"You have no idea how happy that makes me."

"Oh, I think I do." I kissed him.

* * *

**The end**

* * *

**The sequel and in the same time the last part is **_**Eternal.**_

* * *

**AN **The title of this part _Second Coming _meant Alex becoming the evil Luthor as replacing his father's place as the villain.


End file.
